Saturday, December 09, 2006
...stergeR
If you had one chance to undo something in the past, what would it be?
Whenever I think of this question, my mind would be flooded with endless possibilities. All the I-should-have's and why-didn't-I's. Yesterday, I came across one such thought. I was supposed to be out running errands but I ended up staying home to play mahjong with my aunties. As I laid in bed last night, I explored the what-if's, and kicked myself for not using the day more wisely.
I hate looking back and regretting the mistakes I've made. I hate airy fairy daydreaming sessions that make me wonder about how my life would have been different if I had chosen another path. Maybe that's why I love the movie Sliding Doors so much, because that's how I think about stuff. Wouldn't it be nice to have a ctrl-z button to undo silly errors or have a sneak preview of the road ahead before we actually take it?
Whatever happened to me yesterday was a minor screw-up. Imagine the bigger, more life-changing mistakes that were made. Sometimes, I hate myself for not making smarter decisions in life. But then again, who's to say that the so-called stupid decisions are actually wrong? It could be God's way of leading us into His intended path. We'll never know I guess...
This is something which I need to learn - Letting go and moving on. Life needs to continue and I need to believe that things happened for a reason. Decisions shape who we become. I may not be able to fathom or undo the decisions which I've made, but that's what regrets are about - No turning back, no second chances. I just gotta learn to move on.
Posted by Jo at 12:36 PM
